Journal 1/23/25 Aspirational Aggro Toeing off slyly while running Every step is self doubt being transformed to aggro Press the walk sign aspirationally It does not turn immediately You changed the moment you press the button Waiting makes me aggro You can walk every isle with a sense of composure Returning cart aggro style slamming into plastic pylon Aggro is in the beginning or end It is finesse and it is delicate ＼＼\٩(๑`^´๑)۶//／／ 1/24/25 Mantra Every morning I wake up and whisper to myself. Three rounds of, “you’re not special, you’re not special, you’re not special“. Every night I finish this conversation by saying “yet”. m(__)m 1/25/25 Govlink-Psychic Warfare 🎶 Tfw when the beat hits your brain and you think about contexts in which the music would even better be enjoyed such as wood working in your home studio (imaginary) out in rural America but then you think about if the music has a place of more cultural relevancy/origin such as a metropolitan setting and the mismatch of locale, activity in which you are or imagine yourself engaging in diminishing the feeling you are feeling while listening to the beat because the life that you built is now subverted away from happiness and tranquility because you found such an amazing yet contrasting experience and now you are yearning to live in NYC with your GF because you love her and you hope she wants to be with you anywhere in the world but then you also remember it’s time to j u s t d a n c e and you begin to cry too Second entry: Santa is an neglectful and absent father figure or is complacent in workplace misconduct/emotional abuse. If Santa sees you when your sleeping (god like) how dare he allow the other reindeer to bully Rudolph? Is Rudolph his employee? What forms of accountability does the North Pole have? I'm outraged 1/26/25 Today is a slow day where I feel like I’m running out of steam. Three people in the past two days have told me that they are building back up their stockpiles. Perhaps I am doing the same. 1/28/25 I ran out of protein bars at work. This is a huge problem as I work in a quick f o o o o o d desert. I am the one looking into the restaurant dreaming of the time and charcuterie others are afforded. I work until 7pm. 2/2/25 Distraction is the best cover for absolute control. I only check my phone now for the weather.