⠀ . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . .. . . . . . '., . . . 'b * . '$ #. .. . . $: #: . .. . .. *# @): . . . . :@,@): ,.**:' . . ., :@@*: ..**' . . '#o. .:(@'.@*"' . . . 'bq,..:,@@*' ,* . . ,p$q8,:@)' .p*' . . ' . '@@Pp@@*' . . . . .. Y7'.' . . :@):. .:@:'. .::(@:. - you are home - https://bun.blue - https://www.last.fm/user/bluebun - recovering los angeles native in pontevedra - say hi mgmt@bun.blue ┏━━━━━━━━ 00.00.98 12.17.17 moved to edmonton, canada 05.18.20 i have grown so far apart from people!! it happens but it makes me sad because i miss my friends a lot. the house is empty now so i physically feel it much more. 05.25.20 i am doing better to reach out to others finding that i enjoy occupying space more than i do interacting with it. i get tired if i talk but i am happy i am still afforded space to be present. 04.21.21 moved to studio city, california 05.23.21 moving on from this place in my head. thank you for giving a few thoughts some home. 10.16.21 “care without community” and found myself resenting the place i built for them. i am happy they will grow. i am sad i can not be there to see it. there is nothing to fix resentment and the wish now is to have seen it sooner. this place is kinder than you could ever know. there is nothing you can do to fix the thing in your head. i want to exist along side others. 07.19.22 moved to sudbury, england 09.06.22 slowing down and seeing it all for what it really was; an unkind predicament. becoming more of my self the further i am from that place. five thousand miles is a long way from where we started - becoming smaller as i grow. learning to see more for what it really is, becoming honest with my self and kinder to my head. things are harder than they ever have been, but not because i’m fighting my self any more — fighting the world to make a place i want to live. i want to live 11.02.22 moved to paris, france 02.15.23 i am a much different person for the absolute better, yet in much worse circumstance. i wish i had the insight i do now to go back and be kinder to myself then. 07.02.23 moved to new york, new york 07.09.24 moved to pontevedra, spain 07.07.25 a lot has changed, another five thousand miles from home. for the better; we did the surgery, we made it out of the states, we got married, we found new people, we found there is a future worth fighting for now. for the worse; i grew complacent over the year i have been here, i didn’t finish the album and the label is mad, i relapsed again, i cut my self off from every one in the after. i miss my home and my grandmother and my friends and my cat. this place is my future now — my home would have killed me — but with how quick i was to leave home, and how it all feels now .. im unsure if i was quite ready to leave it yet. 07.08.25 i finished that site. i went back to the gym. i finally filed for residency. i went on many, many walks. i did another god knows how many applications. i tried to accomplish more things to occupy the time i’ve found. departing every social space months prior has freed up my time as of late dramatically, with the side effect of filling my head with The Void. i’m not a fan. being forcefed short form slop and fomo notifications was better than this i fear. 07.09.25 a text conversation i had tonight “i also .. opened up abt what happened that day and theyre happy ur doing better.” “idk if im doing better” “just different” i’ve been here a whole year now. clearly i tend to move around a lot, always in search of something i can’t name. every time i just end up sad in a new, unfamiliar place. unsure why it would ever be all that different. ␄ ━━━━━━━━━━┛