'`°*•☆ nov 22 10pm: porting some of the logs over to my site... might port over the rest too, willll see. or otherwise archive for myself somehow. embarrassed about the shysofties (edit: even while i wholly shamelessly stand with the having been in the shysofties!), but nonetheless want to archive the stupidity for future me to look back on hahah oct 22 10:30pm: while i already declared this spot temporary silly soft feelings log - for continuity's & closure's sake, looks like i'm getting out my head with this one finally!!! or at the least i can see a way clearer way out of my own head about this now (crushfriend clarifying to me he doesn't feel the same way - which i rly respect) oct 14 1:40pm: the https://tranceparty.net radio's the only thing keeping me awake currently it might be. it plays recordings of most of the sets from seasons 1 and 2 on random rotation. listened thru however much of the tp10 seretide one i caught, now however much left of the tp03 john montoya one. [2:40pm addtn: been on the tp:joker femi one now] definitely need earlier sleep tonight. 9pm: this pushed me into seretide mixes off of soundcloud type of evening. keeps the shysoft-dream friend yearn at bay, keeps the momentum at least mentally somewhat. washed my hair finally, over a while. got to pack lunch for tomorrow... oct 11 3pm: telling myself i gotta rein in my brain about stupid soft feelings stuff but looks i'll need either more clarity, more humbling or Both to be able to pffffff nah but it's all cool. not the only angle i've been getting humbled on. and i prefer being embarrassingly honest/direct about feelings-things... [sniiip] sept 17 4pm: at work. sleepy https://special.fish/lists/68be10a3ed2964de54e2b668 love this list of lists have been having friend by james k on loop from the shop aux (basic speakers nearby the main comp, hidden behind the battery stands) all day today sept 15 9:30pm: "for what ive considered to be dry crush-kindling" fuck sake i dont know what but something mustve lit that on fire a bit. crush-embers. call me bouncy the way i'll ball about this, sometime, no matter what the outcome could/would be. do wanna be stupidly honest/earnest about that directly but i get shy. cool cool cool ok cool ok cool ok cool jul 18 '25 2am: people in my head rentfree embarrassingly soft vaguethoughts for what ive considered to be dry crush-kindling stupid mosquito bites [sniiiiiip] ~~~ don't really know how to fill the rest of this space i got in here. but i don't have to!