previously @mcmcmc <!-------March 11th--------> I want to improve my vocabulary. I took a nap and I woke myself up laughing. Now I feel warm and light. <!-------March 10th--------> I looked at images of him last night and I felt nothing. Not longing, nor regret, nor fondness. I didn't think it was possible for me to get here and now it feels bittersweet. I will say nothing more about him, I promise. For future reference: No one is worth losing yourself over. In time, you will forget. You need someone who believes in your dreams. Do not look for abundance in empty wells. Looking at my writing from 6 months ago, I struggle to recognize myself. I seemed very optimistic and self-assured. <!-------March 9th--------> "You have passed all of the tests! :)" I'm happy Did anyone here use dump.fm? I miss that community and I am grateful that I found this one. <!-------March 2nd--------> Reason not to message the dude from CA who I miss: - I need to accept that it's not going to happen Reason to message the dude from CA who I miss: - I want him to know that I still care about him I didn't message him <!-----February 29th------> Today was a good day. good day = meditation + exercise + healthy food + water I got to ride a Peloton today and I think I get the appeal. The cycling classes are live and gamified so you can see your score relative to all the other users on the screen. As I rode the bike, I imagined myself as the lady from the Peloton ad. Hi @skwak! When I see images of myself, I see someone who is uncertain. A friend of mine told me that she thought I was super confident until she got to know me. The more I think about this I become more unsure about the true relationship between how I think I am perceived and how I am truly perceived. Thank you for your questions. To be treated as weak or incapable sounds frustrating. I hope that in the future people who want to help you respect your autonomy ♥ <!-----February 27th------> Waiting for Godot by Samuel Beckett (Play) Two characters, Vladimir and Estragon engage in a variety of nonsensical, pointless conversations awaiting the arrival of Godot. (Godot never arrives) Thinking about @skwak's observations about being perceived as weak. I am perceived as someone who is assertive and strong. I don’t feel that way 99% of the time. I often desire to be treated as someone soft and vulnerable. I think this is an indirect cause of my voice - quiet, body - hunched, presence - unassuming. I relish in acts of chivalry towards me, though they are infrequent. <!-----February 26th------> I like this website because everyone is creative and positive. I will start fresh with this in mind. Anicca, anicca, impermanence, impermanence.

Things I like about myself

  • I am easy to talk to
  • The shape of my eyes
  • My collarbones
  • My idealism
  • My sensitivity

Proof I am human

  • The internet makes me feel objectively worse, but I use it to avoid feeling empty
  • Constantly searching for meaning in randomness

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