https://www.instagram.com/2angel02/, miami waters

3/3 euuu.. working with established Adults is very hard. especially w my Mental issues , working under them and trying to please them without seeming desperate or young is so hard.. im currently working as an assistant for a photographer making a public art guide in the area i work at and its kind of easy but i never know if im being a bit "cringe" , im just trying to help as much as possible... i dont even get any profit from this either cuz i cant drive so i take ubers to the train every morning and the cost of one uber is equal to how much i make in an hour.. and ive only been working with her for one hour every morning cuz the shoots r short... im literally going insane i hope this isnt all for nothing i had a bit of a revelation yesterday and i kinda wanna start thinking about applying to a major museum downtown, but i dont think im qualified ... 2/18 currently working at previously said gig for the first and maybe last time because im essentially just someone to come in if the other dude cant.. kinda sucks because i need money but its ok im gonna look for another job i keep zoning out and whenever i have to talk to people lately im hyper aware of how . insane and deranged i sound oh but its an art exhibit.. for harmony korine,.. maybe i dont have to keep my cool anyways its my bffs bday today and i bought them a really cute beanie w bunny ears to stay warm in the cold ass nyc weather. hope ur not seeing this magnus! 1/28 its been a minute!!! im unemployed but might have a gig at a pop up gallery soon, either a harmony korine exhibition or something else im also currently working on my hometest, lets see how that goes im really hungry. chicken kitchen coming soon! 10/9/20 over a week into october now thats rly weird ive been actually remembering my dreams lately which directly started when i started my job. like for all of quarantine i couldnt remember my dreams but now i can some recurring imagery/feelings: the black paint on my nails peeling/falling off, cuddling/feeling warm near someone things r ok 9/30 tomorrows october! ive realized something a little inappropriate lately but basically a lot of my problems can probably be resolved with rather.. adult interactions maybe that thought process is what gets people into shitty situations and is just a product of my touch starvation and realization that im nowhere near as close to my friends as i used to be but theres nothing better to do nowadays i think. i cant wait until i dont care anymore and just download tinder. ive also been taking a lot of ubers which i hate and just doing so many things i hate and constantly being on my phone to remove myself from my environment and its like im tearing down all the progress i made throughout quarantine which is kind of sad but i guess you cant really help it cause were going through unfortunate times i dont really hold as many expectations now and my guard is higher. feelsbadman also my therapist ghosted me (again) 9/23 september changed me a lot. i went from thinking id work at gamestop to working as a gallery attendant and having to talk to rich people everyday. its been scary but i understand more things now. august log is kinda weird in retrospect im looking forward to my future a bit even though im really scared, its no longer a straight road (never was i guess?) also i cant have therapy anymore, working full time 8/1 i hate that its august im gonna be alone for a while im trying to work on a zine though 7/20 im starting free therapy today mainly for trans stuff, kinda scared cause im forcing myself to talk to a stranger about my problems and im convinced this will not benefit me but im doing it regardless

cool song

  • https://youtu.be/O7qJQVCC298

check it out

  • https://youtu.be/k7w2fhtLz-g
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDL0lwhrQ6g&t=648s
  • https://youtu.be/Fdeai8G3qa0

angel is a fan of