wageslave/larper — 25.10.02 i've been trying to do some tasks without any break, distraction, or optimization. no music, audiobook. no small departure to finish another task. the other day i literally watched a pot boil, which was surprisingly fast. i went to the laundry machine yesterday, knowing it was a few minutes from finishing, and just waited for it to be done, staring at a leaf on a bush out of the window. this type of action feels rule-breaking; i'm not supposed to be this inefficient. and yet i crave this type of action, one that isn't subservient to a steady pulse of notifications or a hierarchy of importance. the task is the focus, for its own sake, at its own time. the fear here is that one could lose the bigger picture, get lost in these tasks and miss something important. but i am finding quite the opposite, focusing on a single task prevents me from getting bogged down by optimized busywork. it also feels like such basic shit, and my instinct is to feel shame for such a lack of focus, but i know this won't help me.