creating a process called getting the knots out whereas i stand in front of the mirror and comb my hand through my hair pulling the knots pushing them loose even though they tug back i look at myself in the mirror while i tug at my head i pull up all the old knots ive been fed and one by one i pull them apart as if they never held firm from the start and one by one in turn and by kind i remember having done the same back in 2009 and something lame, to say the least then getting in bed before 9 and so i remind again and again that all of my knots have been apart of my rope from the start and simple as that a twist and a grab they all fall in the same limp way 10/1 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 9/27 ❀❀❀ missed like a ton of homework in the past week. Feel like shit abt myself because of it, but i always find a way to make myself feel like shit. id like to have some big statement that i breathe out like a calming exhale right now, but i never do. Im always just feeling this tight knot. maybe its my asthma, that built this tendency in me to associate breath with stress. To feel a barrier to breathe is to suffocate. Is it some sort of poetic joy to you dear reader, to watch me recite in flowery words that much of my life has been a struggle to breathe? ❀❀❀ P.S. Rest In Peace DJ Rashad you were part of the beautiful community that has burned strong throughout the history of Black Chicago, may your legacy live on and continue to prosper with respect to your character {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{}{}{}{}{}{]{][}[]{}[]}{}{]{}{}{][}{}][}}[{}{}{[][}{}{[][{}{}[]{}{}{{}] listening to: (favs - ❀) One of These Things First - Nick Drake ❀ Im Gone - DJ Rashad ❀ seven - sunny day real estate la bruja - victor martinez ❀ amante bandido - Miguel Bosé The Lady Has No Heart - St. Elmo’s Fire ❀