dearest woman to me – the energy of mabon renews and reminds. what has the dormant spirit eaten? what news from childhood? I do not think it has been enough, the scouring of the internet – the longing for it to make tangible the inexplicable desires of my emptiness. how can the phantom be made whole when it cannot be touched? i don’t know what it houses, if i really think about it. the body thrones the spirit, the meal, the smells and textures. over and over again i try my best at rejecting the shallow inspiration, but it is sugar to the tongue of my sweet face! and do i not love art? beauty? the thought made known? i see as i type that it often comes down to excess. we allow ourselves to gorge, it is encouraged, money made. always remembering that it hurts when i go too far.